It’s really hard to understand why or how someone could be so into you and everything can be going so great then all of the sudden that person does a 180 on you. It’s difficult, no matter how little or long you guys were together, how much it hurts has nothing to do with the time frame and everything to do with how healthy you are as a person. We all know how that feels, to be on cloud 9 then BAM you hit the pavement and you didn’t even know they pushed you off the floating puff of bliss. Almost anyone takes a change like that, which happens so quickly, pretty badly. While this is never fun, and it hurts a lot, this is an opportunity to work on your stability. Everything bad that happens can be good for you if you change your perspective and just see it that way and a lot of the time we are more in love with the idea of someone than the actual person. Which is confusing, but as soon as that infatuation fades, you start to see everything about that person that wasn’t right for you. That phase is always around the corner, you’ve been there before; I’ve been there before, just have to keep reminding ourselves of that during the grieving process. The days after losing someone is like taking yourself off of heroine, because people can be very addicting, and when they’re no longer there, you start getting desperate and feigning for them. Difference is you can’t spend the last of your cash to buy some more supply of them, you just have to do without. This is a test of your strength; you can break down, tear your apartment to pieces, call them over and over again, curl up in a ball and cry for hours, but the whole time you’re doing this it’s out of complete desperation. Desperation is controlling you. Desperation is going to make you do things you wouldn’t normally do, all because you were forced to go to rehab by the very drug that got you hooked in the first place. So this is the part where you let that desperation take you over, or decide that you’re not going to let someone else control your happiness. I suggest option two, because the moment that you decide you’re going to try to be happy, is the moment you start getting better. It’s time to work on you, it’s time to heal yourself, and it’s time to become a stronger person that is better equipped to love someone. As tempting as it is, rebounding is the worst thing you could do. Instead of just being with yourself and getting over it on your own, as you should be, you’re looking to someone else to fix you. No one else can fix you but YOU. Instead of looking for a shoulder to cry on, take this time to be alone, and work on being better at being alone. There will come a lot of times in your life where you are alone, that’s a part of growing up. You can’t run to another body every time you feel lonely, because that is something deep within you that will never change if you can’t work on it and work through it. If you start working on your emotional and mental stability, and become a better person completely alone, imagine the type of love you could give the right person that comes your way. No baggage, no pain, just love. You went through pain, grew from it, and now you know exactly what NOT to do to someone you care for, because you’d never want to see them hurt as badly as you did. I myself have gone through this, I have been mistreated and I have been the one to mistreat. When I was 18 I got engaged to my boyfriend of two years and not to long after he proposed I cheated on him then broke up with. I was able to hurt him and be so thoughtless because I had no idea what pain was, I had no idea the type of hurt that would cause someone—I was not fully equipped to love someone yet. Since then I have gone through so much emotional pain at the hands of others and due to not being stable myself, but I am thankful for all of that, I see the light in it. Now that I know how it feels to hurt so much, I literally never want to see someone go through that, especially not the person that I care for. I wish I would have known that 5 years ago so I could have saved my boyfriend at the time a lot of heartache, but that’s the risk of loving someone who doesn’t know what pain is yet. So don’t look at your pain as crippling, or say “why me?” view it as an opportunity to grow into a better person, to never do to someone what has been done to you. This is a chance to figure yourself out and be ready for the amazing person God has waiting for you. Everything happens for a reason, even the bad is put there for a reason, trust that God knows what he’d doing, bad times are just a test of faith, don’t fail.